The similarity attraction relationship is there an ideal one

the similarity attraction relationship is there an ideal one

If you were brought up on a diet of Disney fairy tales, you might be forgiven and The Little Mermaid all perpetuate the idea that the ideal partner is In fact, one study found that almost 80% of us believe in the idea that opposites attract. to study the impact of similarity on the early stages of relationships. Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication 11(1) () article 8 [13] Wetzel, C.G., Insko, C.A.: The similarity-attraction relationship: Is there an ideal one?. It is proposed that we are attracted to similar individuals because: (1) such individuals are similar to our ideals and (2) such individuals are.

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An assertive woman, for example, would be attracted to a submissive man while an extroverted man would be attracted to an introverted woman. As it turns out, there is almost no evidence to support this hypothesis. Studies of friends and spouses consistently find that two individuals are more likely to be friends and spouses if they are similar in terms of their personalities.

This includes the new study which looked at digital footprints of more than 45, individuals, rather than self-reported data about personality. The results of this study showed that people with similar personalities, based on likes and word choices in posts, were more likely to be friends. The association was even stronger between romantic partners. In fact, the idea that we are more attracted to similar others is incredibly robust. One review of studies with over 35, participants found that similarity was a strong predictor of attraction in the early stages of a relationship — finding no evidence that opposites attract.

Psychologist Arthur Aron believes that, while similarity is important, there may be some situations in which it can actually undermine attraction. He argued that people also have a need to grow and expand the self — and that one reason why we form relationships with others is because we can assimilate some of the qualities of our partners, which promotes such growth. The implication is that we will be attracted to others who offer the greatest potential for self-expansion — and someone who is similar in values and traits provides much less potential for growth than someone who is different.

So, the model ends up predicting that dissimilarity can sometimes be attractive, especially if you believe that there is a good possibility a relationship will develop. But of course, the picture gets more complicated when we consider how couples actually behave in real life. This article was originally published on The Conversation.

the similarity attraction relationship is there an ideal one

Read the original article. But what about those not yet married who want to avoid such communication barriers? An attraction similar to finding your opposite is rooted in finding a common companion.

the similarity attraction relationship is there an ideal one

Some are happiest with an athlete while they themselves are a couch potato, but there is also something to be said for having a spouse who can join in on your favorite pastimes. For this same reason, couples with similar interests tend to last longer, as their relationship is rooted in an emotional attraction rather than a more superficial one.

Most of us tend to be attracted to people who are similar to ourselves

Sharing a common interest in goals and activities, often attracts people before physique, leading to a deeper and more meaningful relationship. Finding Love Based On the Similarity-Attraction Effect Now that you have been sold on the concept of similarity-attraction theory, think of places where you can see this theory in effect and meet people who share your likes and dislikes.

If you are younger, perhaps in college, this task will be easier. Putting yourself in a position where you meet people who have similar interests increases your chances of finding a mate who has similar interests. Emotional attraction comes quickly especially in team building activities, so if you are a sports enthusiast or love the great outdoors, get out there and play!

Another way to meet people while utilizing the similarity-attraction effect is to join social networking sites. Be sure to present yourself honestly — no misleading photos or fabricated achievements here.

  • Examining The Similarity-Attraction Theory: Do Similarities Attract?

The goal is to find that special someone, not create a second life to visit when your three dimensional one does not suffice. A final way to meet people is to ask one of your friends to introduce you to people who have similar interests. Finding someone through a third party is perfectly acceptable, but do not make a habit of it if you find it does not work out.

It can be a huge blow to your self-esteem if you date continuously, but it never goes nowhere.

the similarity attraction relationship is there an ideal one

Blind dates and the 15 minute date concept work well with some, but not all. Go easy on yourself if you are unlucky in the dating world, and remember that most people find love when they stop searching for it. Similarities Attract, But Can Also Detract While the concept of similarities attracting is valid, some people find that they are TOO alike and this can lead to issues in the relationship.

While most people with common interests find a close tie to be had, sometimes things can get in the way of this.

There are cases of star athletes, namely figure skaters, who fell in love through training and lived happily ever after. However, there are also tales of bitter breakups laced with competitiveness and personalities too similar for their own good. Be cautious and know the drawbacks of dating someone similar, but also keep in mind that there is great potential to be had.

Most of us tend to be attracted to people who are similar to ourselves

Competition If either of you are involved in an elite sport, a challenging hobby, or have other similar interests, competition can get a bit too fierce. This is observed a lot in graduate students, both working extremely hard toward their goal, and only one is accepted into an exclusive program while the other is rejected. If you have had the time to develop stronger roots, you may be able to overcome the feelings of inadequacy and rejection, however, many couples do not.

Commit to support each other in all you do, otherwise there is very little rationale for moving forward.