How to stay positive in a difficult relationship

Train Yourself to Be More Positive in 5 Steps

how to stay positive in a difficult relationship

Staying positive isn't exactly a simple task, but there are ways to it difficult to maintain a positive outlook—but it doesn't have to be this way. But happy couples know how to maximize the positive—teasing each other, who can tease can use that modality to handle the tough stuff in a relationship. A lot of us have been taught that being happy in a relationship is something your own view to naturally look at the positive aspects of your love. Nothing good ever came from keeping yourself wrapped up and closed off in a relationship. you to realize they aren't that bad, and it helps you start to heal.

If you question them about something, you can expect an argument. Even a compliment could create a confrontation.

Does this happen often and leave me feeling bad? Does this really matter in the grand scheme of things? Can I empathize with their feelings instead of dwelling on my insecurity?

how to stay positive in a difficult relationship

Confront compassionately and clearly. When you attack someone, their natural instinct is to get defensive, which gets you nowhere. If you approach someone with compassion, you will open their heart and mind.

That gives you a chance to express yourself and your expectations clearly. There are all kinds of ways you can feel vulnerable in relationships: When you express your feelings for someone else.

When you admit you made a mistake. Power allows us a superficial sense of control, whereas true, vulnerable being allows us a sense of authenticity. Think before acting on emotion. This one is the hardest for me. As soon as I feel hurt, frustrated, or angry, I want to do something with it—which is always a bad idea. When you feel a strong emotion, try to sit it for a while.

When you learn to observe your feelings before acting on them, you minimize the negativity you create in two ways: When people get close, boundaries can get fuzzy. You act out of guilt instead of honoring your needs.

how to stay positive in a difficult relationship

You let someone offend you without telling them how you feel about it. That means you have to love and respect yourself enough to do that: The only way to truly have loving, peaceful relationships is to start with a loving, peaceful relationship with yourself.

how to stay positive in a difficult relationship

Enjoy their company more than their approval. Instead of focusing on what you can get from that person, focus on enjoying yourselves together. Oftentimes the best thing you can do for yourself and someone else is let go and give yourself permission to smile. My life—and all of our lives—is filled with challenges that make it very difficult to be positive sometimes. More often than not, I find myself veering toward a positive attitude. Believe a Positive Attitude is a Choice This step was hard to take at first.

I no longer point fingers and place blame. I am in control of my attitude, and no one can take that away from me. When I decided to make the change to live a more positive life, I had to rid my life of the most negative influences in it.


In addition to removing negative influences from my, I also had to get rid of some of my own negative behaviors, such as drug and alcohol abuse. I had to take a step back and examine which behaviors were good for me and which were not. I learned to focus on the positive things I was doing—such as working on my blog and cultivating new, positive relationships—and let go of the negative ones. This process was not easy and, to be honest, is still ongoing, but I know this: Look For the Positive in Life In every person, in every situation, there is something good.

We have to look. And sometimes we have to look hard.

10 Ways to Have Peaceful, Loving Relationships

The old me was content to sit back and just glance around. If I saw negative, I went with that feeling. I found it much, much easier to sit back and just accept what I saw which was usually the bad. Everything—good and bad—is a learning experience so, at the very least, you can learn from bad experiences. If you really take the time to look, you will usually find something good, something genuinely positive, about every person or situation.

Reinforce Positivity in Yourself Once I started thinking more positively, I realized I had to reinforce these thoughts and behaviors in myself so they would stick. As with any sort of training, the more you practice, the better you get—and, yes, you can practice being positive. The best and easiest way to do this is to be positive when it comes to who you are. Tell yourself you look good.